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Self-Care: Finding Our Own Realistic Bliss

Not a Border Collie…but you get the idea, I’m sure!

Happy New Year, everyone! Balloons are not dropping and corks are (probably) not popping, yet we have turned the page. It didn’t take much for me to realize that I was one of many whose celebration of a new year took place at a time different from the rest of society. While I am proud of my membership in that “unique” cadre of individuals known as music educators, it took a while for me to grow in my understanding that I needed to practice what I was preaching to my students. That is, “You are your own measuring stick.” If you were to ask my students what I mean by that, they would tell you that they need to avoid measuring themselves by anyone else’s capabilities and needs. It can be all too easy to drop into that pitfall of comparing ourselves and our programs with others. While we share the adage of, “You do you” with our students, we frequently put our own needs to the side when news of achievements, scores, and competition schedules fill social media.

As we start another year of teaching, planning, seeking balance in our lives, washing, rinsing, and repeating, I would like to offer these three areas of questions and thoughts for your reflection.

Demonstrating respect for our own time and space

Students finding their way to our classrooms or offices during their study halls or lunch waves: sound familiar? There’s no surprise there, as they typically consider our rooms to be their home bases. For so many of us, that is a source of pride. Our students know where they are safe and welcome. With that realization comes the fact that the pleasure of their company also has the potential to diminish the time that we legitimately need to decompress from the stressors of our days.

Questions: How do you feel about preserving your prep time for yourself? How do your students react when you honestly share the fact that you just need some down time? Depending upon the way your schedule is structured, would you be able to regularly preserve time for yourself? Do you feel strongly enough about your down time to simply post a “quiet time” sign on your door?

Calgon? Seriously?

While those of us who are old enough to remember those iconic “Calgon, take me away!” commercials might be approaching retirement age, there are still others who are still actively teaching.

Questions: If a good soak surrounded by aromatic therapy and singing bowls isn’t your thing, can you identify anything else that has the ability to soothe your frayed self? Would you be willing to carve time out of your schedule for even a half hour to spend just on yourself? Can you find a place to either go for a walk or run, or sit by the shore?

About that axe…

As I write this section, I’m remembering hours spent in practice rooms, in the library doing score study, and even sitting in the middle of so many impromptu chamber sessions that seemed to pop up out of nowhere during my undergrad and graduate studies. I also remember my conducting teacher’s words to his ensembles at the start of each year: “Music is our drug of choice.” If you are among those who actively gig, bravo/brava!

Questions: But that “drug”…when was the last time you enjoyed it because it had the ability to fill your soul? When was the last time you made music because you wanted to? If you haven’t done so, when was the last time you felt free enough to make music on your own or with a group of peers? How would you feel about inviting someone to make music with you?

We are planners. It is in our nature to map out our curriculum, our lessons, our programming, and so much more. With that said, I invite you to take time out to plan some time, space, and (in)action just for yourself. Our respective blisses are waiting for us to welcome them. If you have more suggestions for self-care, please message me. In the meantime, have a wonderful year ahead, colleagues!

Stay well and safe!
Nan

Featured

It begins.

Finding the edges of my day…oh, there they are!

“Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus.” ~ Alexander Graham Bell

Are you the kind of person who struggles to find time for themselves? Do you feel as if you have a message to convey, yet can’t find the time to express it? I’m fairly certain that you’re not alone in this feeling. I can tell you that I’m right there with you. The late Toni Morrison once shared, “Write at the edges of the day.” I’m going to take Ms. Morrison’s advice to heart and use the edges of my day to speak through this blog. Listen closely and you’ll typically hear me speaking while the early morning coffee is brewing or in the late night hours when the only other creature stirring in the house is my cat, Finn. I hope you and I will mutually benefit from this humble sharing of thoughts, questions, concerns, and humor. Until next time, I hope you’ll succeed in finding the edges of your day, as well!

Our “Normal.” IYKYK.

As an educator, some memories stay with me from each group of students. They include the funny comments that come with the innocence that brands the younger ones. They also include painful conversations that students share with adults they trust, perhaps the only adults with whom they feel they can truly confide. This year, my seniors will have been with me since they came in as 6th graders. As has been my tradition for far too many years, I included the “what if’s” in our first class together. The memory that stays with me from the Class of ’26 was their response when I asked them to point to the safest place in our room if someone was trying to break in. As if one, they pointed to the correct corner. No laughter. No smirks. Just pointing to the corner in silence.

Come tomorrow, I’ll go through the same routine and guide my students through the steps we’ll take, what I will expect from them, and what they can expect from me. To say that this breaks my heart each time I go through this minimizes the reality. Our kids deserve better. We, as the teachers responsible for providing them with the best education in the safest environment possible, deserve better.

Legislators, get your act together. We’re doing our job. It is past time for you to do yours.

peace,

Nan

March Madness = One of My Happiest Places

If you’re a basketball geek like me, March is our month. I was able to get through the Big East Tourney as a Creighton Bluejays fan in exile (UConn is a mere hour’s drive away from my front door) but came away saddened by their loss to the St. John’s Red Storm. While watching real-time results of that ill-fated championship game, I eagerly awaited our Boys’ Basketball Team’s face-off in their D-I tourney.

Sadly, our Team didn’t bring home the win. It was beyond difficult to see them hold back tears (some, unsuccessfully) and even more so to try to comfort them with hugs. Let me say that this crew, as are so many of the other athletes in our school, are warriors. We are a small school that has been blessed with talent on the courts, in the pools, and on the fields. This crew…well…they are just different. I don’t think I’ve ever seen members of a basketball team with such balance. When I speak of balance, I am simply referring to the fact that they take care of business (big time) on the court but manage to just be good humans in and around the hallways and classrooms. If I didn’t know what their jersey numbers were from watching them battle their opponents, I wouldn’t know they were such gifted athletes who were following in the footsteps of others who left their mark on our school’s history while wearing the Red and Grey.

I marvel at how they do not bring their court/courtside personas with them as they go about their days. Their names are on the lips of others and their stats are well known throughout our little state. As a fan of the sport and of this team, I am just so grateful for the chance to have been in their orbit. This year, I have had multiple opportunities to just chat with the senior players about life (and basketball), discuss their plans after commencement, and even just laugh about “school stuff.”

This post is just a way of saying, “I see you and truly appreciate you” for all that you are to Amyre, Amare, Sae’, and Tyler. You and your teammates have honored our school community with your talents. Onward, gentlemen. Onward.

Now, on to Selection Sunday and Monday…and the 3rd marking period!

peace,

Nan

Teachable Moments Where I Least Expected Them

I am a basketball geek. I love the game. Aside from swimming/diving and equestrian, basketball is my game. Our girls play well but our boys are outstanding. They are the defending D-1 champions in our state and were recently ranked #1 in the polls. They play hard and leave it all on the court.

I have a few of the seniors in my unstructured study hall. I’ve enjoyed having them check in with me for sign-in and love the chance to banter with them. Only one of them was ever in my ensemble. Despite that, those seniors never fail to give me smiles, fist-bumps, and hugs. They’re not angels, but they truly represent the good that is in our school community.

Last night’s game was a hard-earned “W” for them. The game was very physical. My vantage point was courtside and across from their bench. When I get into “mom/nana” mode, I cringe every time someone hits the floor or wall pads and worry when I see even the hint of a limp. Sorry, guys…that’s the way I roll. Over the years, I have noticed that some officials converse with the players during the games. I’ve watched them quickly speak to them after fouls, when a player takes the ball out, and at the foul line before shots are taken. I couldn’t hear what was said, but I noticed that the players were frequently “conversational” with the officials. Puzzling…things that made me go, “hmmm.”

Since our auditorium is located right across from our gym, officials have started to use my drama office before the games and during half-time. After last night’s game, I had the opportunity to meet the officials and chat with them a bit. It was during this time that the veil over the “conversations” between officials and players was lifted. The officials told me that they try to explain their calls to the players so that they will become more aware of their actions and not commit the fouls again. It wasn’t enough that they “caught” them doing something “bad.” These officials made the calls into teachable moments. I found myself questioning if I could do more of this in my engagements with students in my classes and around the building.

I didn’t catch the names of last night’s officials, but I would like to thank them and others who practice the same call/teach routine with our student-athletes. I appreciate the fact that they are helping to guide them towards being better versions of themselves. Now, to remember that we can use the same routine in our classrooms, in our hallways, around our campuses, and more…therein lies the challenge.

Have a great weekend.

peace,

Nan

p.s. Go, Saints!

Turning the Page (the reason why God made erasers)

I’m not quite sure how the first two weeks of 2025 have moved by so quickly but, as is displayed by brand-spanking-new Border Collie calendar shows, they have. With that said, I am doing my best to be mindful as I head into the new year both professionally and personally. Ah…the challenges.

I continue to seek the best ways to organize my teaching space. It isn’t a typical music room. Sadly, we got flooded out of the best teaching spaces I could have ever imagined. Yes, I know, Nan…look ahead. We follow an A/B block schedule, which means I need to rotate my classroom to meet the needs of two 6th-grade Vocal/General Music classes and Symphonic Band with my 7th-grade Vocal/General Music classes, Concert Choir, and an Ensemble Class.

I’ll look for ways to maximize our teaching/learning space and plan on sharing them here. Stay tuned!

Onward!!

Nan

Time to “vacate”

We’re done. 2024 is a wrap. No more “wake-ups.” You get the gist of this post. Most students and teachers are rejoicing that they are done with their academic tasks until they return to their schools in January. That is, with the exception of grades that need to be calculated but those can be taken care of in front of a roaring fire while wearing comfortable clothing. The question remains: Why do we cherish our vacation time as much as we do?

Speaking for myself, I just need to recharge. I love what I do and the people I do it with. Teaching music students in grades 6 through 12 and directing a thriving theatre program keeps me on my toes. It also starts to wear me down, especially during December. Two staged productions followed by a Christmas Concert is never boring. It is always challenging only because I am constantly on the quest for repertoire and scripts that will challenge my students to be and do their best.

Performing Arts educators live a unique life that is frequently difficult to explain to people “outside the fold.” Composer Randall Standridge recently posted:

The moment I read it, I felt as if I had finally found a clear explanation. Successful habits…that is what I want my students to develop while honing their skills as musicians, actors, and theatre techies. Then, I thought about the 2014 film Whiplash. I’ve never seen the entire film. When my students ask to watch it, I refuse to show it. Why, you ask? Simply put, one clip just set my teeth on edge and reminded me of horror stories (heard and experienced) of teachers and colleagues who embodied the teaching strategies of Fletcher https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OV8SSs_JfBo. I know about the stresses that evolve the closer we get to concerts and opening nights. As Standridge stated, our product is on view for everyone to experience and judge. We want our product to be the best possible representation of the collaborative work put forth by us and our students.

As I look back on the fall semester and especially, the last few weeks, I know that my students are as spent as I am. It has been a very rich semester. My 6th and 7th-graders staged a comedy in the style of film noir that made us wish we had performed it at least two more times. I highly recommend Victoria Sayegh’s Farmageddon and the Undercover Crop.

My upper-level thespians brought us to The Barricade with their presentation of Tim Kelly’s Les Miserables. Kelly’s adaptation of Victor Hugo’s classic was a wonderful challenge for these students. This cast and crew outdid themselves with each successive performance.

Our Christmas Concert brought out the best in these students as they performed and also listened to the other groups in our department. The upper level musicians had the chance to remember what they were like just a few years earlier. The younger ones got a glimpse of what they could achieve.

As I write this, I can look back at life in our classroom and on our stage since September. My students and I stretched our artistry, grew as a community, and did what we were supposed to do…gift our audiences with our talents. And now, it is “time to vacate.” I wish everyone a peaceful, happy, and healthy holiday season with the prospect of a safe 2025.

peace,

Nan

Bagley-isms: IYKYK

Although I began my journey as a musician at the ripe old age of 5 (I still celebrate that date), I did not fully experience life as an ensemble musician until I began my undergraduate studies at the University of Connecticut. At that time, I was a Music Ed major with Organ as my applied area. That meant that I was required to perform with one of the choral ensembles. I started off as a member of the Chorus. This was very much a “catch all” group for people who were good but needed to polish their skills.

As luck would have it, the major work selected for that spring was Mendelssohn’s Elijah. A monster of a work but filled with glorious choruses and solos and, especially wonderful, accompanied by the University Symphony. Since I was a member of the Chorus, my section sat to the outside of the entire Chorus with the esteemed Concert Choir centered on the risers. It was during those rehearsals that I realized just how much I wanted to conduct. I could feel it. I could see it. The reason for what I was sensing was the not-so-tall African-American man on the podium: Dr. Peter Bagley. Dr. Bagley (I couldn’t call him anything other than that to his face) embodied so much. His musicianship was unparalleled but not only because of what he could get out of an ensemble but because of how he attained it. I wanted to be able to look at an ensemble the way Dr. Bagley did. I wanted to have my musicians connect with me the way his did.

Fast forward nearly 35 years since I last sang in his ensembles, alumni and friends came together from across the country to honor his memory and do what musicians do best…make music this past weekend. We gathered in Von derMehden Hall as we always did and reconnected with ensemble mates we hadn’t seen for many years. We warmed up and we made music the way he taught us. I had the honor of conducting a movement from Handel’s Messiah. I surely do hope that I got Peter’s approval from up on high.

Take-aways from my time in a Bagley rehearsal:

  • Always have at least one sharpened pencil available at rehearsals (Ticonderogas are still the “pencil of champions.”)
  • Number your measures. Just do it.
  • Always post the “order of worship.”
  • An ensemble’s first sound in warmups will indicate how the rehearsal/performance will go.
  • The power of the “wink,” “trembling hand covering eyes,” and “beaming smile.”
  • Diction. Diction. Diction.
  • The meaning of “ensemble” and the value found in building a community.
  • The same sound (no pun) teaching practices used in middle school settings are transferable to conducting in higher education.
  • First, be a teacher.

My classmates and I were in Dr. Bagley’s ensembles during the “golden years” of UConn…remembering “Peter, Paul, and Gary,” Victorian Dinners, Spring Tour ’90, and so much more.

Thank you, PB.

#choirmom

Sourdough starter, grading, storm watch…life continues.

One of the many reasons why I enjoy life in New England is the opportunity to enjoy all four seasons. Tonight, we’re watching the predictions for Winter Storm Lorraine. There was great rejoicing when we heard the all-call system click on during the last block of today’s schedule. The dulcet tones of our head of school announced that, indeed, there would be a snow day tomorrow. Fast forward to this evening and I’m grading exams, and working on my latest culinary project: making a sourdough starter.

As a newbie to from-scratch sourdough baking, I searched for a system that was clearly laid out and also engaged with others interested in learning this skill. Emilie Raffa’s blog fit the bill for me and I’m currently on Day 3 of this journey. My ultimate goal is to have starter that I can maintain while using it to bake breads and bagels worthy of bearing spreads of our favorite butter, none other than Kerrygold. Be still my heart.

Grandma would be proud.

Now, about that grading. This year, I let my students know that I was starting a 5-day grace period for assignments. Simply put, any assignments that I post in our Google Classroom include a due date/time. Anything completed and returned by then would be eligible for full credit. Late assignments received after that point will be docked a point for each day up until 5 days. After that, the hammer goes down and the grade turns into a 0. Every now and then, a student will see their 0 and tell me that they completed the assignment on time but forgot to turn it in. I find myself asking how we can teach our students to be responsible for their work. What does it take for them to understand the value of staying on top of their tasks and meeting deadlines?

With that said, I wish you all a safe “snow day,” students who continue to grow in their knowledge and maturity, and the opportunity to try new culinary adventures.

Absent, but not really missing…

I’m actually embarrassed to say how long it has been since I last posted anything here. Time has passed and “things” have happened in my life and in the lives of those around me. I allowed those “things” to block off a bridge that I enjoyed building between myself and anyone interested enough in reading my musings. It feels great to say that as of today, the blocks are being removed.

We’re at the start of another significant snowstorm here in New England. This is nothing like what the people of Texas are experiencing, so I’m a grateful human. Since our school is in the middle of its winter break, my students and I would say this is “a waste of a perfectly good snow day.” Even as I type that, I’m thinking about the crises taking place in the Lone Star State and just shaking my head in dismay. Thoughts and prayers hardly seem like enough for anyone in the middle of that mess.

I’m in the thick of writing what I hope is the wrap-up of my dissertation. My writing space is simple. It is the place where I’m the most productive and can find the peace I need to make progress. Cup of coffee…check. Border Collie…check. Binders stuffed with relevant literature…check. Music…double check! My secret to staying in the zone: www.classicfm I admit this is my guilty pleasure and it never fails to feed my musician’s soul. Elgar, Whitacre, Lauridsen, Vaughan Williams, Bernstein…yes, just to name a few.

As I read through transcripts of the interviews I collected for my research, I feel nothing but humble gratitude for the chance to speak with some great examples of my profession. And with that, break time is over for this morning. Stay well and safe, everyone.